It’s not up for debate.
If those words make you bristle, if they make you immediately respond with defense, take a step back.
If you haven’t had this discussion with someone yet, then let’s have it here. Black lives matter does not mean that only Black lives matter. It doesn’t mean that Black lives matter more than other lives. It doesn’t mean that your life doesn’t matter if you are not Black. It simply means that Black lives matter.
This is a phrase that needs to be spoken, because our society continuously proves that it does not perceive this to be truly the case. We’ve shown time and time again that Black lives are not treated with the same value as other lives are, primarily meaning White lives. We need to seek out equity in our lives, and if that scares you, then I would ask you to look within yourself and ask yourself why it bothers you to hear the words Black lives matter.
If your response is to say that “all lives matter,” then I’m going to ask you to pause and ask yourself if you really believe that to be true. Ask yourself if the way you live your life proves that, or if these are words you’re just speaking or typing. Ask yourself if the undercurrents of what you say to others, whether they be Black or White, prove that you believe all lives matter. Ask yourself if you are living and breathing those words, or if you are using them as a shield to prevent yourself from digging deep into why the phrase “Black lives matter” bothers you.
If you’re someone who is struggling with hearing or saying “Black lives matter,” or someone who is frustrated, angry, or scared about what’s happening right now, I encourage you to first, look at the resources below to learn, read, or listen to content that might help you understand the context of where we are right now. Take time to listen instead of asking to be heard.
I’ve been reflecting a lot on what my role in this conversation should be – and I mean that in terms of this blog. In my own personal life, I’m choosing to educate myself, make more conscious decisions about where I’m spending my money (including a list of places I will no longer frequent due to their bigoted views), make donations to charities that are making a difference, buy and read books on racism and White privilege, and what many (and admittedly myself) perceive as the most uncomfortable: have blunt conversations with people about racism and its presence in our country and the rest of the world. This means not staying quiet because it’s easy or convenient when someone is devaluing the lives of others. Staying silent is a privilege, and one that I intend to no longer use.
I’ve said it before in my poetry, but I’ll say it again here: There are no more innocent bystanders, and you are not one.
Neither am I.
And so that’s what leads me here, to my blog. I’m obviously not an authority figure on racism, and I in no way want to paint myself as one. Don’t turn to a White girl to educate yourself on the experiences of Black people in America – listen, read, and invest in the stories that Black people are sharing. Listen, and really listen. Then do something to change your life, because in turn, that choice will change another’s life, even if it’s in a small way. 2020 has been a damn tough year, that’s for certain, but it is a year that has pleaded for all of us to look around and start caring about one another, really caring about one another, and that’s something we need more of. So far, there are many who have not been up for that challenge, but I hope they will change.
What I’m trying to say here is that I don’t want to virtue signal or try to make my voice the loudest. I don’t want to make a post on my blog or Instagram page claiming to know it all, or to educate others. I want to listen, as I’m urging you to do. I’m learning, and I acknowledge that I will make mistakes along the way, but I hope that I will be afforded grace as I continue to educate myself and to become a better ally in what is going to be a very long fight. And if you’re looking to make a change, to do better and be better, I will afford you that same grace. We can all learn and grow together – there is room for everyone to walk forward together.
All of that being said, I do believe it’s my responsibility as a human being to speak up. I think if we choose not to speak up, choose not to speak the words that Black lives matter, then what we do is leave open a space in which others can fill with bigotry and racism. If I choose to stay silent, I leave a space for others to be vocally hateful.
So I want to make it clear where I stand. Black lives matter.
I want to leave you with some resources to help educate yourself and to be a better ally. So check out the list below for numerous things you can read, watch, or listen to, as well as places to donate or sign petitions, if that’s your jam! There are a lot of resources below, but there’s a lot of work to do. Start here, or do your own research and find modes of education that work for you. There’s plenty out there.
I collected this information from a variety of instagram accounts, articles, and videos. Sources for the below information:
- @heynadine
- @roohiamber
- @tin_house
- Sarah Sophie Flicker and Alyssa Klein
- REI
- Washington Post
- Forbes
- Fortune
To Watch
- American Crime
- American Son
- Blindspotting
- Becoming
- Coach Carter
- Dear White People
- Detroit
- Explained: The Racial Wealth Gap
- Family Reunion
- Fruitvale Station
- Hollywood
- Kevin Hart’s Guide to Black History Month
- LA 92
- Malcom X
- Marshall
- Mindhunter (Season 2)
- Miss Virginia
- Mudbound
- Oprah Winfrey Presents: When They See Us Now
- Queen & Slim
- Seven Seconds
- See You Yesterday
- Self Made: Inspired by the Life of Madam C.J. Walker
- She’s Gotta Have It
- Strong Island
- Teach Us All
- The Innocence Files
- Time: The Kalief Browder Story
- Trial by Media (Episodes 2 & 3)
- Trigger Warning with Mike
- When They See Us
- Who Killed Malcom X
- 12 Years a Slave
- 13th
- #BlackAF
Hulu
- If Beale Street Could Talk
- The Hate U Give
Amazon Prime
- Do the Right Thing
- Hidden Figures
- The Hate U Give
- A Ballerina’s Tale
- I Am Not Your Negro
- Little Fires Everywhere
- If Beale Street Could Talk
- Roots
- Blackkklansman
- Harriet
- Killer Bees
To Rent
- Black Power Mixtape: 1967-1975
- Clemency
- Get Out
- I Am Not Your Negro
- Just Mercy
- King in the Wilderness
- Selma
- Sorry to Bother You
- The Black Panthers: Vanguard of the Revolution
- The Rosa Parks Story
- Whose Streets?
To Listen To
- 1619 Podcast
- About Race Podcast
- Cape Up: Voices of the Movement
- Code Switch Podcast
- Desert Island Discs: Bryan Stevenson
- The Diversity Gap Podcast
- Here to Slay
- Intersectionality Matters! Podcast
- Jemele Hill Is Unbothered
- Momentum: A Race Forward Podcast
- The Nod
- Truth Be Told
- Seeing White
- Slay in Your Lane
- Small Doses with Amanda Seales
- Toure Show
- Pod for the Cause
- Pod Save The People
- Still Processing
- United States of Anxiety
- Witness Black History
To Read (See the “Bookstores” section under “To Shop” for great businesses that you can support while seeking to learn!)
- How to Be Antiracist by Ibram X. Kendi
- So You Want to Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo
- Not My White Saviour by Julayne Lee
- White Fragility: Why It’s So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism by Robin Diangelo, PHD
- Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehisi Coates
- Check Your Privilege Myisha T. Hill, Brandy Varnado, and Jennifer Kinney
- Me and White Supremacy by Layla F. Saad
- Black Feminist Thought by Patricia Hill Collins
- Eloquent Rage: A Black Feminist Discovers Her Superpower by Dr. Brittany Cooper
- Heavy: An American Memoir by Kiese Laymon
- I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
- I’m Still Here: Black Dignity in a World Made for Whiteness by Austin Channing Brown
- Just Mercy by Bryan Stevenson
- Redefining Realness by Janet Mock
- Sister Outsider by Audre Lorde
- The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
- The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin
- The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness by Michelle Alexander
- The Next American Revolution: Sustainable Activism for the Twenty-First Century by Grace Lee Boggs
- The Warmth of Other Suns by Isabel Wilkerson
- Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston
- This Bridge Called My Back: Writings by Radical Women of Color by Cherrie Moraga
To Shop
Skincare and shaving
- Oyin Handmade
- Solo Noir
- ehoneyskin
- OUI the People
- Himistry
- My Butter Bar Skincare
- Black Girl Sunscreen
- BLK + GRN
Cosmetics
Food and Drinks
- Tastes Anaia
- Theopolis Vineyards
- McBride Sisters
- Partake Foods
- Golde
- Ivy’s Tea Co.
- A Dozen Cousins
- BLK & BOLD
Fashion
- A.Au
- Ceecee A Closet of NYC
- Dorca Creates
- Brother Vellies
- Hanifa
- Wear Diop
- Sherah Online
- The Folklore
- Nubian Skin
- The Wrap Life
- Nude Barre
- Onabags
- BLK MKT vintage
- Melanie Marie
- Peace Images Jewelry
- Jamandrico
- Third Crown
Art
- Oh Happy Dani
- Material Life
- A Single Suggestion
- Natalie O Decor
- Lepenn Designs
- Unwrp
- The Conscious Kid
Lifestyle
- Mahogany Books
- Uncle Bobbies
- Harrietts Bookshop
- The Lit Bar
- For Keeps Books
- Brave and Kind Books
- Black Baby Books
- Books of Melanin
- Semicolon
- Brain Lair Books
- Afriware Books
- Detroit Book City
- Hakim’s Bookstore
- Ashay By the Bay
- Eso Won Books
- Cafe con Libros
- Frugal Bookstore
- Bronx River Books
To Support
Racial Equity and Justice Organizations
- Antiracist Research & Policy Center
- Audre Lorde Project
- Black Women’s Blueprint
- Color of Change
- Colorlines
- Equal Justice Initiative
- Families Belong Together
- The Leadership Conference on Civil & Human Rights
- Muslim Girl
- MPowerChange
- NAACP
- National Domestic Workers Alliance
- RAICES
- Showing Up for Racial Justice
- SisterSong
- United We Dream
Racial Equity in the Outdoors
- Black Girls Do Bike
- GirlTrek
- Inclusive Woods & Us
- Outdoor Afro
- Refuge Outdoor Festival
- Soul Trak Outdoors
- The Outdoor Journal Tour
Travel Influencers
- Lee Litumbe – travel and style. @spiritedpursuit
- O. Christine – travel, wellness, and the outdoors. @ochristine
- Oneika Raymond – TV host, writer, international speaker, and explorer. @oneikatraveller
- Glo – creator, coach, educator. @glographics
- Aaiyami Gold – visual storyteller and clothing brand founder. @asiyami_gold
- Keem – solo traveler and explorer. @thepassportabuser
- Clé Hunnigan – storyteller and creative producer. @alivelikethewind
- Ciara – solo female traveler. @hey_ciara
To Donate (I’m going to plug the Cauze app here – it’s a great app that connects people with organizations they support or want to donate to. Cauze is a “on a mission to unleash more good into the world, one giver at a time,” which I love. Check them out.)
- Black Lives Matter
- NAACP
- National Domestic Workers Alliance
- The Bail Project
- Black Visions Collective
- UndocuBlack Network
- Hope Not Hate
- Know Your Rights Camp
- National Black Arts Festival
- We Love Lake Street
To Speak
- A comprehensive list of petitions that still need to be signed (there are many): blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/#petitions
- Even more petitions here: signatures.carrd.co
If you’ve absorbed everything from this list, or are looking for other resources, check out this Anti-Racist Resource page: antiracistresource.info
Also, here’s an article for White people who want to be allies.
Let’s adventure together, and let’s do better together.